Nuke Soccer

By Ben Knight Onward!
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‘Twas the weekend before Christmas, and I would’st like to drink a toast from a glass half-full:

And so it was that word filterethed down to the City of the Reds that the wise men wot runneth the Canadian Football League did’st tell the Cynamons and Sokolowskis they wouldst not be permittedeth to dock their Goode Ship Argonaute in the green and pleasant soccer harbour that isith BMO Field.

And there was great rejoicing amongst the soccer tribes, for verily had’st they believed themselves to be pole-screwed by cruel and arbirtrary fate – just as the Curse of Turf haddeth been lifted from the sacred greensward, witheth the promise of sumptuous state-of-the-art sheep food to followeth.

But now the threat t’was smitteted and slain – by the verye rules of the gridiron goliaths who had’st so darkly threateneded ye joyous tymes to come.

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